Newly Wed-nesday! Gift Registry For Real Life

Over the last few weeks I have been developing new projects and additional features for the blog. Being newly married, and having worked with so many couples as a designer over the years, I created Newly Wed-nesday. My purpose is to share my experiences and tips on everything from wedding planning and trends, to setting up a new happy home. For my first installment I decided to tackle the gift registry. If you have a wedding coming up this spring or summer, now is the time to create your registry. Waiting until the last minute can add more stress than necessary. Putting together a useful registry takes time and thought. There are a variety of options for gift registries and you will need to find the best fit for you. I created a few guidelines to help navigate the registry world. 

Just starting out and not living on your own before marriage can actually be the most overwhelming situation because it is difficult to really know what your needs will be. You don't have a household routine yet and you pretty much need everything. The key to creating a "good registry" is resisting the "kid in a candy store" approach. Walking around and shopping with a scanner gun can be dangerous. Companies are slick at marketing to newlyweds and it's easy to get sucked into the hype. Tagging every item that you think is cool without having any direction is fun, but after you settle in to you home you will probably regret it. I see so many registries and say to myself, "you will never take that out of the box." Stay practical. Unless you know with certainty that you will use a specialty item, don't register for it. I'm talking about doughnut makers, cake pop machines, panini presses, juicers, beer makers, waffle irons, etc. You know, the fluffy stuff. All of these items are great fun but if you really want one, I suggest asking for them for a birthday or Christmas after you get the basics. Not to be a bridal bummer, it's ok to treat yourself to a couple splurge items but in this case, limit your registry to three.

What if you're a bit more seasoned bride and groom? When you have two established people combining households, its a very different philosophy. Chances are your biggest issue is having too many things and a lot of duplicates. So, create your inventory and decide what stays and what goes before going to register. Next, stick with the basics and determine where you might need an upgrade like towels or linens that may have seen better days. Once you've got a baseline, consider practical additions like a special piece of specialized cookware or small appliance that you have been wanting. Then get less practical. Here is where you can add the splurge items like the ice-cream maker. When you get married after living independently, you can pick more of the fluffy stuff because you are more likely to choose items that will be used since you have everything else. Select places to register that are less broad and more tailored to your needs.

I recommend registering at three places giving your guests options. Also, multiple registries gives you flexibility mix up a variety of household categories and ways for guests to give. If you are just starting out, I would stick with two larger department stores and one home improvement store. Make sure that you don't choose stores that are only regional if you have guests across the country. Don't assume that in the age of online shopping that everyone does it. Not true. Consider that some people like, older family members may not be comfortable with buying online. If you fall into the established household category, keep it safe with at least one department store but you can mix it up a bit more with a couple specialty shops like a local boutique or an electronics store for items like cameras and audio equipment. A trend that is becoming more and more popular is the charitable gift registry. Websites like the I Do Foundation will set up ways for your guests to give to your select charity or charities on your behalf.  Once you have decided on where, its time to start creating your registry. Where to start? Pre-planning is key. Most large department stores are set up so that you can start the registry process online without having to go to the store. In my opinion, this is the best way to start without the temptation of all the pretty marketing displays to overwhelm you. However, once you get a foundation in place, you should visit the store in person. It is helpful to see items in person and many stores have products that are only available in store and not online and vice-versa. Visit the website of the store(s) that you have chosen. Almost all of them have a Registry checklist to get you going. Here is my breakdown of how to approach their list form a realistic and practical point of view.

1. Start with big ticket items. These are the items that you should invest in good quality and durable items that you will have for years to come. Vacuum, Microwave, Grill (yes, I think this is a basic), and Cookware. You only need a large stock pot, 2-3 sautée pans, 1 small 2qt. sauce pan and 1 med 4qt. saucepan 1-2 cookie sheets and an oven roaster. Unless you are a serious cook you don't need every size of pan and pot that is in existence. 
2. Tabletop. Here is where it gets tricky. There is an old school of thought that you should register for two full sets of dishes, one for everyday and one formal. I love dishes. I have several sets, but that's me and I use them. Even if its just my hubs and I, when we want to have a special dinner, I bring out my formal china. This is also probably the one time that you will ever consider buying formal china. If you are a traditionalist then go for it, but this is truly a choice that you should consider for yourself and the way you live and entertain. Formal china can add up to hundreds or thousands of dollars so is it that important to you to have a full service for twelve? My best suggestion is somewhere in the middle. Choose a high quality everyday set in a neutral pattern. Pick out a few serving pieces in a fine china pattern that coordinates with your everyday items and a couple items of crystal like a beautiful vase for a centerpiece. This gives you versatility to pull them out when you want to dress up your dinner table and still have a few treasured keepsakes. Overtime you can build on your crystal and china serve-ware to expand your collection.
3. Kitchen/Small Appliances-Coffee Maker, Mixer, Toaster, Crockpot (you'll thank me later) Iron and Ironing Board, Mixing Bowls, Cooking Utensils, Cutting Board (synthetic and wood), and Knives.A nice Chefs/ Utility knife will be your work horse, in addition to a Pairing knife and Bread knife. 
4. Bed and Bath-Don't skimp on towels. You will need more than you think. I recommend two colors, one neutral and one accent color . You can mix and match and add another color or pattern later. Get at least two full sets of towels and two bath mats to rotate. Bedding is dependent on your living situation. If you know you are moving into a one bedroom, don't register for three bedrooms of bedding. By the time you get into a bigger place and can actually use it, you'll probably want something different anyway. Select a nice comforter set, bed skirt, mattress pad and two sets of coordinating sheets so you can change up or have a spare on laundry day.
5. Garage. (Now you know why I suggest registering at a home improvement store.) Often overlooked but very important. Starting out a new home and having to purchase the utilitarian items can add up fast. Getting a jump on things can prevent a big hit to a new home owners budget. What you will need is partly dependent on your living situation whether house, apartment, or condo. However, there are some must haves. Tools. Get a multi-purpose set of tools including wrenches, screwdrivers and a hammer. Every home improvement store has packaged starter sets that are economical and very useful. Lawnmower. Again, dependent upon your circumstances but a big ticket item that is a much more useful than a fondue set. Ladder. Gotta have one at approximately 6 feet. A few garden tools. Rake, Shovel and Small Hand Tools. Emergency and Safety Items. Not the most exciting things on your registry but the most important. Fire Extinguishers, a Fireproof Personal Safe for important documents and Rechargeable or Self Charging Flash Lights. 

These are just tidbits to help you choose products that will fit you and your family as you begin your married life. In the end, your registry will be unique to you and your fiancée. After you get a good registry foundation fill in the blanks with what works for your new life together and the things your really want  A successful registry is one with input from both of you. It's also a great opportunity to test the waters of marital compromise and another way to learn about each others likes and dislikes. Finally, remember that it's all just stuff. The true gift is the life the two of you will build together. Best Wishes and above all enjoy every minute of your engagement and wedding planning. I hope to see you back here next Newly Wed-nesday.